tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6240530201591736473.post1844087062499189179..comments2023-12-10T01:42:41.310-05:00Comments on SL Newser - People: Ask DrFran: "A Friend in Need"Bixyl Shuftanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15409792769906782556noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6240530201591736473.post-50507245643290186912013-03-08T16:37:42.513-05:002013-03-08T16:37:42.513-05:00"If she preferred the company of guys for int..."If she preferred the company of guys for intimate contact, I would have asked her out."<br /><br />Why not ask her out anyway? You don't need to have "intimate contact" to be a friend to someone. Visit the shooting ranges and the combat sandboxes, like you used to do back in the good old days. Take her zombie hunting - there are several places where you can do that and have a blast. When it comes time to talk about problems, don't just sit on the ground looking sorrowful. Go to a club and chat in IM while dancing and listening to music. Clubs are full of people having fun, and the fun is sometimes contagious. Also, clubs are sometimes full of people looking for friends. You never know what you, or she, might find. There are other happy places you can visit and explore without needing to jump on poseballs and emote.<br /><br />There are people in Second Life (I know at least one) who have multiple problems and have no one in Real Life they can talk to. If that is the case here, then you may have become this lady's lifeline. And after a while she may realize that if there's one person in the world (you) who cares about her, then she shouldn't call herself worthless. And if she doesn't realize it, you can always point it out.<br /><br />Of course the other side of that coin is that there are folks who love to tell others how depressed they are. They thrive on sadness, and gleefully dump their pain on anyone who will listen. If your time with her becomes a never-ending series of gripe sessions, then you should decide whether to disengage or be pulled down yourself. You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped.<br /><br />But hey, mega-kudos to you for trying to help in the first place. Most people would probably say "Aww, she's no fun" and walk away. Good job.Hal Jordanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02211348428722973679noreply@blogger.com