Interview With Xavier Thiebaud

 

 By Bixyl Shuftan

 

Addition: Two videos added to near the bottom

Xavier Thiebaud is a man who has seen and done much in Second Life. Way back, he was one of the avatars on the Beta Grid before the virtual world officially opened. He's also been involved in theater and co-founded the "A-List," a popular group for clubs and others to announce events. But after a long Second Life, Xavier recently announced in the A List that he will be departing in September. I recently met up with him, and we talked for a while.

Getting to his home, we greeted on another, then the interview began.

Bixyl: To begin with, describe what you do here in Second Life.

 

Xavier: (laughs) I wear many hats and I am seen in various roles. I am the owner and founder of 'The A List!', which is a community of SL's finest from all walks of life, Artist and Fashion and Live Music and Cultural Arts such as Opera and Ballet and Theater, pretty much the things that makes up Second Life, Arts and Entertainment. 

 

Over the years I've also have used my influence to help guide the direction of the culture within Second Life. So I can be seen as a politician in a way.  I have also helped make people famous, get noticed. I've also have put on huge special events, like my Farewell party.
 

I am an Ambassador, gate keeper, face of Second Life I can also be considered as equivalent of a Hollywood  movie or music producer. When my late girlfriend was alive, we were also into philanthropy, nurturing young up and coming artist and talent.

Over the years I've had average citizens tell me they have never heard of me. And I smile and say "that's the point.' My goal was never to be famous, but to help others achieve fame. I name drop and say those house hold names you know, I have known for many years. And my rolodex is vast, all across Second Life. They call me friend. That's good enough for me.

Bixyl: Sounds like you've done quite a bit. How did you find out about Second Life?

 

Xavier: Oh my. Have you ever heard of The Sims? ... Me and my friends came from The Sims Online back in 2002 and 2003. We were the Beta's, (the) founders of Second Life itself.

Xavier then invited to take me somewhere. We both ended up going to Plum (132/52/33), where there was a three-panel wall with names. This was The Beta Contributor Wall.

Xavier: Bixyl, this is where everything began. I get a little misty eye when I come here. Many of these names were my friends. I've lost touch with them. Almost no one even knows this is here. I doubt the new Lindens do either.

 

Oh we were a crazy wild bunch, professors and artists and hackers and dreamers like me. A motley crue of misfits.

Bixyl: What date did you drop in, and how did your first days go?

 

Xavier: I can't say exactly as Xavier is my 4th incarnation. I lost all the others, I did not take it as seriously then as I do now. I would never of dreamed I would of still been here, after 20 years. (noticable pause) Oh, my, GOD!  IT'S BEEN OVER 20 YEARS!

 

Bixyl : Guess time flies when you're having fun *grins* How did those early days go?

Xavier: Well, people made things for the pure joy of creation. We had a true sense of community,  friendship. "Hey look I made a T shirt. Here want one?" "I made a new thingamagig. Here have one." Now it's all about money.

 

We had hackers and mafia wars and a Shadow Government. Did you know Anonymous was originally formed here? 

 

Bixyl: No, and I don't recall anyone saying it was.

Xavier: Yes it was. People don't know or won't say. Like I said, I know all the secrets long forgotten. It got so bad. They attacked Linden Labs. Linden Labs was being hacked. It was insane in the early days. You had to know how to defend yourself. I always managed to remain neutral despite keeping a high profile.

Bixyl: What did people have to defend themselves from besides hackers?

Xavier: Well we used to have huds or shields. Some were so strong they were banned.

Bixyl:  Sounds like there were a number of fights. What were these Mafia Wars and Shadow Government?

Xavier:Oh it got brutal. Shadow government was well. Griefers who griefed griefers or players who played outside the rules of the TOS, enforcing vigilante justice."

 

We then teleported to another spot. This was at Kirkby (130/164/24). In front of us was a wall with a number of spheres with names over them. Some were familiar such as Luskwood and the Ivory Tower. Others were not, such as the Kentucky Fried Engineering Bucket and the Skyline Graveyard. 

Xavier:This is the Wall of History. Did you know much of the mainland is role modeled and named after California, well specifically northern California, and the water the San Francisco Bay and the names of areas in northern California?

Bixyl: I can't say that I did, though it makes lots of sense.

 

Xavier: My SL Aunt, Heather Goodlife, was the creator of the original waves of Second Life.  I was gonna take you there next and Philips Hill and a few more iconic places.

 

Bixyl would you like your own Phil Linden Collectable Avatar?
 

Bixyl: Certainly, thank you. And yes you can, I do take plenty of pictures. ... Got it and thank you. I'm sure many long-timers remember the jokes about his appearance
 

Xavier: Amazing the things one collects over the years.

We then went to another place, Natoma, and the Ivory Tower or Primitives. Xavier was happy to see it wasn't forgotten with the people around, including one pony who approached us. We had a short conversation before it was time to head out.

 

Xavier took me to another place in Natoma, at (60/204/40). This was the location of the oldest complex object on Second Life, "The Man" statue.

Xavier: Did you know about this?

Bixyl:  I most certainly do
 

Xavier: Good going

Our next stop was in the Teal sim, at (190/59/21). 

We were at the Particle Labratory.

Xavier:  And here?
 

Bixyl:  It's been a long time since I was last here. But yes, I've heard of the Particle Labratory. How would you describe it to those who are new?

Xavier:  I am so old and jaded I rarely belileve anyone is new.  This is a place of learning, how to make things happen. (It) all begins with 1 prim. Script this prim, it moves. Texture the prim, it begins to move and take action.

 

Xavier would take me to one more place, one I had been to earlier in my time in SL, had sadly closed, and was reopened a few years later by Linden Lab. We were at (58,204,24)

 

Xavier: Welcome to The Lost Gardens Of Apollo. Dane was a friend of mine.

Bixyl: Thank you, it's good to be here.

 

Xavier: He shared his dreams with us. He designed it to inspire imagination and creativity and romance and love and magic. Whenever I get tired of things, I come here. (It) reminds me of the magic of SL.

 

That sculpture is by STARAX, the Michael Angelo of Second Life, 100% prims. Pure talent. He once said 'you must torture the prims into submission.' To own one is rare. To display one is luxury. Soo many prims.

 

Xavier thought about the two of us riding a vehicle, but something went wrong. Instead he just looked around.

Xavier:  This is the oldest sim in Second Life. The Lindens now preserve it as a part of our history. Go to midnight. Amazing isn't it.

Bixyl:  Yes it is
 

Xavier:  STARAX did a series of Angels and Demons. Here we see a Demon killing Angels. Very powerful piece.
 

He would teleport us to another part of the Lost Gardens, one that had some spots for couples not far away.

Xavier:  You can see how this place is great for romance
 

Bixyl:  Yes I do
 

Xavier:  Dane loved Second Life. This is Second Life, the magic ... are you still in Midnight?
 

Bixyl:  Yes I am, and I see the aurora.
 

Xavier:  Did you know Raftwet? My partner. We met in 2007, dated ten years, in real life. She passed away in 2017, nearly ten years after we met in SL.
 

Bixyl:  I've heard of her, and I'm sorry
 

Xavier:  Grease and Gemma were her friends. 

 

So love does happen in Second Life. Soo many say SL is SL and real-life is real-life. But we have feelings. It's a farce to think we can insulate ourselves from love. I have so many beautiful memories Bixyl. I would not trade anything for it, not even in real-life. This right here does not exist in RL
 

Here is a tip from an old Avi such as me my friend. When the grid gets a bit much and you think about leaving, remember what brought you here in the first place, then return here, to this very spot. Look over this panarama view, and remember my words.

Live your Second Life on your own terms. No one can tell you how to be. Do what fufills you, and try not to get caught up in the crazy stuff, like clubs and shopping, etc. 

 

Exploration is the true destination.  I am well traveled, and even I have not seen every sim. It's impossible, like counting the stars at night. That is what kept me in Second Life for so long.

And the beautiful wonderful people I met along the way, people from all over the world. Soo many cultures, languages, ways of seeing things. If you are a citizens of Second Life, you are a world traveler, without even knowing it.
 

I will miss this beautiful crazy Alice in wonderland with a blend of Dali and LSD dreamland.

 

Bixyl: You've mentioned earlier that you yourself are departing. Are those reasons private?
 

Xavier:  Oh, well, yes and no. Something happened in real-life. But this is off the record. My friends in Second Life know, but not the public.

He would explain his story

 

Xavier: It's when I had my realization my time in Second Life was up.

 

Simply put, I've done more than anyone ever has. So I am leaving on a high note. I've contributed my entire life to Second Life. Now it's time for me to live in real-life, in a tropical paradise, living 'la vida loca.' Many have said I will come back, or return as an Alt. My true friends, they know I am leaving and with their blessings. Their unselfish love tell me 'go live your life.'
 

I am healthy and happy. My real-life is a blessing. I've also had a beautiful Second Life as well.  I have no regrets
 

Bixyl: So besides living in a nice tropical place, what will you do now?
 

Xavier:  Maybe go work as a consultant in virtual reality. Perhaps talk to the Lindens. Who better than me. In a metaphorical kind of way, would be like me entering the spirit realm and influencing things from another level. That's a beautiful way to end this. (smile) I love Second Life.

Bixyl: Certainly an interesting way to end this ... I take it the A List and other things of yours will go on?
 

Xavier:  Ava Jhamin is the sole owner now. She's been the owner since Raftwet passed and I took time off from grieving. Second Life felt so empty then. I couldn't bare to be here. Now I leave out of joy and happiness, not out of sadness.

Bixyl: You've certainly spoken a lot. Did you have anything else to add?

Xavier: We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of the dreams. 

 

You know, I had an experience rarely experienced by others because I came with people I already knew. I was never a noob. 

Bixyl: I guess one more question, how much longer will you be around?

 

Xavier: My rez is Aug 15th, but I plan on staying for a few more weeks,  and eventually just fade away, later not log in,  eventually uninstall the viewer. Once that happens, there is no going back. 

 

The End.  

Bixyl: Well, thank you for your time, and if there's anything else you wanted to add, let me know.

Xavier: Quite a ride down memory lane wasn't it? I got a little emotional. I am happy with what we said and did, it was honest, heartfelt, and words from an old avatar, sort of like speaking to a person a hundred years old and listening to them tell stories, baring witness to history itself.

I mean it was an honor for me to do what I did, to care witness. Back then, it was a barren wasteland. We had nothing, NOTHING. No trees, water was still, it was kinda boring. And after all that, all I ever learned to do is this ... *shows you my heart* This I made, there. it plays a melody, La vie en rose. So yes, I am an old romantic. Ha ha. Aside from that, all I ca do is rezz a box. I never had the patience to build, But I managed to build an entire community. So I am quite proud of that. No one else has done that. Too many petty rivaleies, jelously bickering, I pulled people together. 

 

Xavier then showed me this video.

Xavier:  *shows you a video of my Raftwet*  I asked a friend of mine, a Jazz musician, to sing for me on Valentines Day. I practically had to put a hit out on someone to get him to play just for me in a crowd of less than 10 people present, and I have had real-life broadway singers perform for me and Opera singers. So yes i've had a privileged SL

Our 5th anniversary on Valentines Day.  If I were the King of Second Life she undoubtedly was it's Queen. She wore her crown so lightly. We would go to a ballroom, dressed up. She gets a special invite not in any group by some underground DJ to a party. Then we show up. It's some downtown scene, a dark alley. We walk in, looking like our car broke down on the wrong side of town, the guest looking at us like as if  'do they belong here?' And they see the owner of the club and DJ give us hugs. So yeah we did. That's the magic of Second Life.

I just wish people could see SL the way I do, not take it for granted or get stuck in doing the same ole stuff, like clubs, or shopping. Maybe more will see a glance of it, exploring. If I had a message, it would be to explore. And also to tip venues more than 50 Lindens, the teirs are expensive. I never even got into why we have a tip based culture, but no point in that. Takes it into a whole different direction.
See these are the things only a few people like me know why, or remember.

Bixyl: Thank you for your time, and whereever your journey takes you, may it be a good one.

A few days later, Xavier would hold the last showing of his rendition of "The Little Prince" in Second Life, followed by a good-bye party. 

Gemma Cleanslate would later catch up to him and ask for the name of his Beta account. He answered, "My Beta name? My last name was either Goodlife or Livingston. I didn't take it seriously then."

 

And so, Xavier's Second Life journey is winding down after over 20 years. Hopefully whatever he does next, it will go well,

Bixyl Shuftan

Commentary: Suicide and Second Life

By DrFran Babcock

There has been a lot of discussion, anger and passion over the Commentary posted by Nydia Tungsten and Brandi Streusel Tungsten on March 2^nd, 2015 in this esteemed publication  (http://slnewserpeople.blogspot.com/2015/03/commentary-suicide.html). When I got to the monthly Newser staff meeting last Saturday, I was alarmed to find that Nydia was not there. According to editor Bixyl, she was taking a break from Second Life™ because of her upset over the event which had prompted her commentary.

 

I had wanted to tell her how much I agreed with what she said. However, I didn’t get that chance, and then the Plurk-driven underbelly of Second Life™ cranked into action, resulting in this SL Secret submission last Sunday. (see number 9 http://slsecrets.com/slsecrets/slsecret-week-341/ ).

I suppose you are wondering why I am inserting myself into this controversy. I have worked in behavioral health for almost all of my life, the last 30 years full-time in a psychiatric hospital. I work in a huge health system, and I am one of seven people who comprise the Suicide Task Force for the health system. I am not bragging; I am attempting to establish the fact that I have been very close to the subject for many years. 

Suicide is always a mess. It means that someone is in enough pain to override the human instinct to stay alive. It means that the people left behind will suffer, and spend their lives wondering what they could have done to prevent it. Most of all, it means that something that was essentially preventable took place.

The fact that someone threatens suicide because they want us to know they are in pain, or because they have learned that these gestures bring attention and love does not mean that they will not eventually complete a suicide — either on purpose or by accident. However, if you tell me you are going to end your life in a venue or situation in which I have no actual access to you—there is nothing I can do.

Nydia and Brandi are angry because they were put in a hostage situation. There is no denying that the person who sent the photos of himself with the gun was in pain, but he put his friends in a horrid no-win situation. 

In virtual worlds, where we don’t always know how to contact the person behind the avatar, it is easy to create a drama. While I don’t know the details of the relationship this person had with Nydia and Brandi, they scrambled to help the man in whatever manner they had at their disposal.

Perhaps this incident can serve to raise awareness of suicide. Suicide is always preventable, provided the person who is suicidal seeks help. The sad reality is that the disease of depression, the single largest stimulus for suicide, can also cause a person to remain isolated and secretive about their feelings. It is never OK to threaten and tease people with suicide, but the suicidal person’s judgment is often impaired.

I applaud the Tungsten’s for venting their feelings about this event. It is time for mental illness and suicide to come out of the darkness. The discussion has to get going. We have to be able to talk about these things so that people understand that suicidal people are in pain, and not bad. What this guy did was an act of anger and need, and I hope he gets help. I hope if there is a next time he feels this way that instead of emotional hostage-taking, he picks up a phone and asks for help.

Many years ago an ex-patient of mine contacted me (my number is unlisted, so I have no idea how she did it), and started to threaten suicide. I got her number from the hospital and called it, but the number had been disconnected. I made some other attempts to contact her which turned out to be all dead ends. I let it go, because I had done all I could do. 

Am I responsible for helping someone who doesn’t allow me to really help them? I think not. I am responsible for making the effort to do so. That is what Nydia did. I hope she can come back to Second Life™. Until then, I will miss her fine writing in the SL Newser. 

This editorial reflects my beliefs, and my experience. I welcome a dialogue, because that’s how things emerge from the shadows. Suicide needs to emerge from the shadows, so we can help.

DrFran Babcock

Commentary: Suicide

By Nydia Tungsten and Brandi Streusel Tungsten

Last night, I had a friend send pictures with a shotgun barrel in their mouth to a few of us. To say it upset me is a severe understatement. They were saying this was how they were feeling, then stopped talking after a while. We all feared the worst had happened. I was in tears most of the night.

I am STILL a wreck this morning as I write this with shaky hands. I have lost two very dear and close friends to suicide, over what they thought they could not endure anymore. I still love them both and remember them, but I do it with mixed feelings.

Their acts of cowardice destroyed lives not of their own, and I am talking about the family members that found them and their friends that have to deal with the sudden loss. Imagine a sister that finds her brother a week after he hung himself, a full week! Imagine what that did to her. Imagine a mother who goes into to talk to her daughter in the morning only to find her dead soiled body on the bed next to an empty pill bottle.

Suicide doesn't just affect the ones that do it, but those that are left behind, and to me, they are the biggest, most selfish cowards in the world. People will say I just don't understand. Maybe they are right, but I will bet you dollars to doughnuts more people believe the way I do.

Celebrities that kill themselves are “Celebrated for their lives and the works they have done” when in fact, they need to be forgotten and the media needs to stop being glamorizing their deaths to the public and making it look like it was honorable. IT'S NOT! They died like they lived: attention whores! That is the message I get from ever celebrity site that has front page news about the latest suicide, and yes it has made me a bit bitter.

And for those of you that feel you need to send pictures to your friends with guns in your mouth, you are the worst.

I am not saying not to reach out, I encourage that. YES, talk to someone. But stuff like
that is WAY over the line and you come across as a theatrical attention whore once the dust settles.

Because of that picture, my nerves are shot, I've gotten very little sleep. I am an emotional wreck as it at LEAST three other people I know of this morning. We were finally able to figure out where they lived and get the police out to them, where they quickly tried to play it off and telling the police to forget about it instead of getting help they desperately need.

If you feel like you want to take your life, PLEASE call someone, ANYONE and talk to them. Tell them how you are feeling, it could be a medical problem that can be fixed!

But if you think you absolutely must take the selfish cowardly way out, find a cannon ball, tie it to your ankles and jump in the ocean so no one will find you. After a while, you will just be forgotten, which is all you deserve.

So it comes down to this. If you want to end it all, please seek help. And if you don't really want to seek help, then SCREW YOU AND DO IT ALONE!!

Nydia Tungsten

Goodbye Perri, Hopefully Only For Now

A little sad news from the HV Community sim, where I make my home on the Grid. One of my neighbors, Perri Prinz, has made a name for herself as a DJ in Second Life, in my opinion one of the best in her selection of 60 and 70s music. She would play at Cutlass, Club Zero Gravity, and other clubs. With her partner RECoyote Mindes, she also owned a club of her own, the Green Meadows Club, which friends also called Perri's Xanadu. Her music got her many fans, and her gentle manner a number of friends. And of course there was her partner RECoyote.

Outside of Second Life, Perri, or "Hunny Bunny" as she sometimes calls herself, was also known as a writer. She wrote the chapters for Spectral Shadows, a long series of stories that mixed themes such as time travel, Fantasy, and Science Fiction, going back for many years. A teleporter at Xanadu would take one to a gallery of Spectral Shadows Illustrations. She would also put some thoughts in a Livejournal, which went across a number of subjects, such as music.

Her latest Livejournal post however was a sad one.

Perri suffered from health problems in real life, and as much as she loved her friends and playing her music, the technical glitches could sometimes just be too much, requiring her to take occasional breaks to rest up. Running her club had proven to be a bundle of nerves, so friends from the FCA club alliance, including myself, had recently been helping her to try to get Green Meadows/Xanadu up and running again.

Unfortunately, one event she had spent hours preparing for happened to occur right on the very day the Grid was hit with its "Unscheduled Maintenance." Not only was getting online difficult, but nothing seemed to work, notably her music stream. It was then she felt there was nothing better to do but leave the Grid for good, saying goodbye to her friends who managed to show up despite the glitches that day.

Since then, Perri's gotten a number of messages from friends and well wishers.  And she responded she might return after an extended hiatus to heal, "REC and my friends … I'm missing them already. … I hate the thought of never being with … the others again. … We'll see what happens. I just pulled the plug. I didn't throw out the computer." Perri's Livejournal entry and responses can be found here: http://symphonic-rp.livejournal.com/203000.html .

As for Club Green Meadows, events there have come to a close, at least for now. It's possible later on the FCA club alliance will try to get the club running again with others playing the music Perri was noted for.

Goodbye our friend, at least for now,

Bixyl Shuftan

*Addition* Perri did come back a few days after this was written.