"Your Mother Has Cancer"

By Deaflegacy,


“Your mother has cancer,” I was told one day.  “It's too late.  They're moving her to the hospice.”  That was what I heard in 2013.  That was the year I was living in Langley before I moved somewhere else. 

My best friend was still alive back then.  We would take a trip to the Langley Hospice so we could visit Mom.  I remember wanting to spend as much time as I could with Mom and at the same time, I can feel that I'm starting to lose her. 

On August 15, 2013, we visited the hospice.  I saw her on bed.  She was asleep.  I didn't want to wake her up.  The nurse told me to talk to Mom.  I talked to Mom.  I told her that everything will be fine.  As I was talking to Mom, I knew it would be the last I'd see of Mom.

 We left.  According to my best friend, Mom passed away fifteen minutes after we left.  I remember arriving at my best friend's place and the phone was ringing.  My best friend answered the phone and immediately started crying.  I just knew.  Mom passed away because of cancer. 

The same thing that took my Uncle away earlier when my Grandmother was still alive. 

At the same time, I was in shock.  Mom was my best friend.  Even though we have had really hard times when I was growing up, we were still best friends. 

Sometimes after I joined Second Life, I found out about Relay for Life.  I wanted to join and offer support.  I did join Relay for Life. 

I did move on, knowing that Mom is with my Uncle and Grandmother.  I know that one day, I would join them.  Yes, I do miss them, and yes, I do resent cancer in every possible way, knowing that cancer did strike four times in my family – my Grandfather, my Grandmother, my Uncle, and my Mother got cancer.  My grandmother survived cancer (it was skin cancer).  I don't know about my Grandfather.  All I know is that my Grandfather did not die of cancer.  It would be my Uncle and mother who died of cancer.  I miss them very much. 

One day, I asked Bixyl Shuftan if I can write about my family having cancer and how it affected me, seeing that my family had been hit by cancer.  I can honestly tell you that each time, it's the same thing.  A hard cold blow, knowing what would happen in the end with my mother.  Do I hate cancer for taking my family away from me?  Yes, I do, very much hate cancer. 

I just know that later on, my best friend got cancer.  She would later die of a cardiac arrest.  I miss her, too. 

Do I think that I might one day get cancer because my family got it?  Yes, it scares me.  But is it possible?  No.  My father's family doesn't get cancer.  When it comes to my uncle and mother, both their parents got cancer. 

Now, I'm a little sad, missing my family.  That's the reason why I joined Relay for Life.  It's so I can offer support to people who have been affected by cancer in any way.

Deaflegacy

"Your Mother Had Cancer."

By Deaflegacy

"Your mother had cancer."

I just looked at the interpreter before looking away.  Later on, I met with my Mother and my best friend.  My mother had been spending some time in the ER.  It had something to do with her stomach so my best friend spent some time with her.  That day, we found out that the doctor can't do anything for my Mother.  It was too late.  It was then recommended that my mother go to the hospice.  We agreed on that. 

Later on, I saw my mother in the hospice.  It was like a home, but these who were about to say good bye to like.  I remember the day before and my mother was doing just fine.  We talked.  We have had fun.  I will never ever forget that day I said good bye to my mother.  My best friend and I went to see her. 

She was in bed.  One of her eyes was closed, and another was open.  I knew right then that I have to say good bye to her.  The nurse stopped by and encouraged me to talk to my mother.  I did exactly that.  I told my Mother that everything will be okay.  My best friend and I will be all right.  We will do what we can for the family dog.  The family dog's name is Gracey.  I said good-bye and we left. 

When we got home, my best friend received a phone call from the hospice.  Fifteen minutes after we left, my Mother passed away.  While my best friend wept, I was in shock.  I knew that my Mother was going to join my Grandmother in Heaven.  I just wasn't expecting that soon.  It still is very painful for me to think about it, especially when we have to give the family dog up for adoption.  I have no idea where Gracey is right now, but I hope she is doing well. 

So many things have gone by and I still think about my Mother.  To me, she was everything.  It is true that there had been bad times, but there had been good times as well.  She was not just my mother.  She was my best friend.  Cancer took her away from me and I did say good bye to her that day, August 15, almost three years ago.  I'd say that this coming August 15 would be the three year anniversary since my Mother passed away.  Not a day had gone by that I don't think about her.  All I can say is that she is in Heaven with my grandmother and uncle.  I didn't tell her this but I might as well say it out loud.  My Mother was much more than just my mom and best friend.  She was my mentor. 

Deaflegacy