Reader Submitted: My Cancer Journey ( Still Outgoing )

 
By Alysabelle Resident.

'CANCER' that dreaded word! We feel for them, those who have been afflicted with Cancer and those who are survivors, caregivers or in remission. I was diagnosed with Small Cell Carcinoma Lung Cancer Stage 3 in late 2020. Ironically I didn't feel any symptoms except, I had pulled a muscle in the chest area. Numerous test later, x-rays, blood work, ct-scan, finally a biopsy . Results: I was told I have the ugly 6 letter word 'Cancer'. Realisticaly, you don't think this will happen to you, but it did to me. I had appointments to see both the Chemo Oncologist and the Radiation Oncologist. As I sat there waiting clinging to hope, because ultimately that's all I had, it also felt like an eternity waiting for them .

Finally they both came in, I look at them there was introductions and they pointed towards picture of themselves, I thought and shrugged we are reduced to looking at pictures of doctors, specialist and nurses because of the mask wearing due to the pandemic. I nodded. I was anxious for them to tell me my prognosis. I said, 'What are my chances?' My Chemo Oncologist said 30 percent.' Now I wasn't just shocked about cancer, I was devastated. My life as I knew it changed from that moment on. I was barely able to continue any conversation, and all I could think of was 'I'm going to die.' This was it, a death sentence hanging over my head and nothing and no one can do anything about it. After all 30 percent was a horrible outcome. I disliked him of course at that moment, that was my emotional feelings inside. I started crying so much so and I look at him upset that he just dashed any hope I was clinging to.

He talked about treatments. 'Treatments,' I thought, 'why bother?' And he walked off to get papers for me to sign. I thought how do I leave here without falling apart, even before I even get to the exit? I couldn't even fathom walking at that point. I was sitting there rooted to my chair 'shocked' He came back and explain to me that some people, even thought not a large percentage, can live 5 to 10 yrs, and he even had a patient that still living, and its been over 10 years since his treatments. It may or may not happen to you. So he talked about a plan with both Chemo and Radiation treatments. It was to start in two weeks. It will be aggressive, three chemotherapies, one from the start, one in the middle somewhere, and one in the end of the six weeks period. And radiation everyday except weekends.They talked about the side effects and the medications I would have to take prior and during and after the treatments and watch for any sign of a fever. I was told ' stay positive.'  I thought, "are they are out of their minds, 'positive'? What is positive about cancer?" I later learned for me it was focus, not positivity, during treatments. They both told me that they will be there every step of the way, they gave me several leaflets with information and a phone number for the Cancer Center whenever I needed, which I did. And I was told 'get your affairs in order just in case.' I now had a Cancer Team.

While I was sitting there I look at both of them and realized that I don't want them to know me with a mask, my name with a mask, no thanks. They couldn't see my true expression and I couldn't see theirs, who could? So I stood up and I said, 'Look at my face.' I removed my mask and I said 'this is me,' and quickly put my mask back on. And surprisingly they stood up and removed their masks and their face guards and said 'this is us.' That small gesture meant a lot to me. Soon after, I got a call to come in to get a scan done and the technician placed four tattoos. They really are called markers for radiation. I cried. It hit me the realization that soon the treatments were about to start.

 For my family and friends in real life, that was difficult of course. They were stunned, but their support and and love and prayers meant a lot to me. I also picked one person to give my updates to everyone else. I knew I wouldn't have the energy to speak to each one individually, or so I thought. And I was correct. There came a time where I actually just texted the person because one of the side effect of the radiation would be difficult speaking because of the location of the treatment.

For online friends, I did the same, picked one person who meant the world to me, my partner, to tell a few selected friends. I also couldn't tell everyone on my list. It was way too much. And even still today, some don't know what I have been through. Then came the morning of my first chemo and a few hours later my first radiation. I can't speak for every one going through treatment. For me it was 'rough.' My second treatment of chemo was worse, 'Hell,' and I felt like death was on my doorstep. I understood then and there, quite clearly why some people going through treatment would want to stop completely. I even thought to myself after several weeks I wont go through the last chemo treatment that was planned .
But I forged on, and did it after all. Also I found difficulty in standing without help or holding on to some kind of piece of furniture or even a wall. One memory I had, I recalled standing in the kitchen just trying to make myself a sandwich holding on to the counter for support, because surely I was going to fall. I managed to butter a piece of bread. I didn't fall, but that's how weak I was. Radiation was a different process, the more you receive the more you start feeling the symptoms of radiation, the sunburn feeling on my back which I got cream for, the fatigue also associated with chemo and radiation combined, the nausea, the difficulty swallowing. I even had to have an IV drip at times so I can get fluids down. I didn't think water would have been an issue swallowing. I thought if anything food would have been the most difficult, that came later.

At some point I was determined they would both get to know more then just ' I'm a cancer patient.' I finally had my chance. I had an appointment several days later with the Chemo Oncologist. I wanted to feel some kind of human connection with him. I didn't feel any up until that point. So I decided to show him two pieces of poetry I had written. I figured what better way to get to know me but through my poetry. There were two pieces, one was light-hearted, the other one more profound. First poem, he smiled. The second one he understood it quite well and pointed at the poem and started at me speechless. I told him 'I know 'and smiled =. I told him I understood that he faced not death personally, but those who are dying and if not dying then those who like me, are receiving horrible news. That couldn't be easy for him and the distance emotionally is key. He talked about his family, wife and children, briefly. I looked at him far differently then I did before and I knew he looked at me far differently now.

Then came the day of my last treatments. Tired as I was, I was elated. It was over. You're told for many months the treatments will still be working in your system. It was longer for the radiation. Two months after the treatment. I ended up with a fever and had to stay at the hospital overnight and start antibiotics. More times than not, your body can start an infection. But not always do they know where its coming from. Then they started talking about immunotherapy. It would have to start within 14 days after the treatments were over. There are benefits as well risks involved, and side effects. Not everyone is a candidate. I wasn't one of them, after all . My last physical appointment with both Oncologists, after talking a while we all stood up. It was time to go. I thanked them. And as I was going to shake their hands, but instead I was soon engulfed in bear hugs from both of them, Pandemic be damned. After that, communication between all of us was to be done virtually.

After three months, I was going for my very first scan to find out how the treatment worked. I was anxious and stressed out for the findings. I was happy they both told me that they saw a decrease in the size of the cancer. For a while the scans are every three months, and then eventually its every six months, and then yearly, if all goes well. So far I have done all the three month scans and the cancer continues to decrease. I just finished my first six month scan, and again with the same results. I'm fully aware that some people, depending on their treatment and the length of their treatments, how difficult it is. Truly my heart goes out to them and in some ways I am fortunate because my treatments, although aggressive as it was, wasn't as long as some people that have to go through it longer than I. There is always someone worse than you. During the time you're going through treatment, you have your cancer support team, you depend on them where I always depended on myself and been always there for others. But this time it was different, to learn to lean on people. It was so foreign to me. You also don't realize how focused you are through treatment, till you don't have to be anymore. It's a huge relief, but at the same time you say to yourself 'What now?' Emotional therapy is the key before during and afterward treatment. I would recommend it highly .

Will I always be a cancer patient? Yes. Do I still have cancer ? Yes, although I'm in remission . Will cancer ever return full force? It could. Will cancer always be part of me the rest of my life? Yes, if not physically, emotionally. Do I have a scar from the radiation location lung? Yes Did my voice change due to radiation ? Ye . Do I want pity from anyone ? NO! I never wanted that in my life and certainly not now. I was victimized by cancer, but I refuse to be a victim. Did I ever question at times 'Why me about my cancer?' I sure did, but then again....why not me?

Writing about my journey, my cancer, it was difficult at times. But if it helps anyone, then it was all worth it. Although in my real life my family and friends know what I have been through, online there are still friends on my list that aren't aware of what I have been through. Perhaps now they will.

In closing ...

I also like to mention a place in Second Life where I attended a meeting, at the American Cancer Society's Hope Haven Survivors & Caregivers Support Group in Second Life.

http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/American%20Cancer%20Society/37/148/23

The lead person at Hope Haven is Sandie Slate (sandie.loxingly). They try to get together every other Sunday if possible. The meeting starts at 12:30 pm SL time.They have Survivor Moderators as well as Caregiver Moderators. There are others I met briefly, the most amazing courageous people I ever met. I was grateful to them for hearing me out. I was overwhelmed with emotions. It was several months after my treatments and I walked in and felt the immediate feeling of belonging. I'm also grateful that I listened to others and what was happening in their lives and how they were coping. I didn't feel alone.

When you have cancer, I understand people sympathize and give you hugs and so on. But there is nothing like someone else with the feelings associated with cancer. Sometimes you want to talk about it, sometimes you don't, sometimes you just want to listen. It's all okay. We are with friends who have either been there or still there. For news and updates, click on the terminal that is placed at the entrance that says' American Cancer Society ' Survivor and Caregivers Info Net.' It's on the ground. Once you click on it, a notecard will appear. It will explain everything you need to know. There is another one at the side of the building with the names and how to contact the Survivor Moderators and the Lead Person as well as the Caregiver Moderators. Cancer is Cancer no matter who you are and where your from. Everyone is welcome. I read a poster that was on the wall in the other building that made perfect sense to me. “Hope .. is not a wish it's a belief." So true (smile).

Thank you (smile)

Alysabelle Resident
 

"Your Mother Has Cancer"

By Deaflegacy,


“Your mother has cancer,” I was told one day.  “It's too late.  They're moving her to the hospice.”  That was what I heard in 2013.  That was the year I was living in Langley before I moved somewhere else. 

My best friend was still alive back then.  We would take a trip to the Langley Hospice so we could visit Mom.  I remember wanting to spend as much time as I could with Mom and at the same time, I can feel that I'm starting to lose her. 

On August 15, 2013, we visited the hospice.  I saw her on bed.  She was asleep.  I didn't want to wake her up.  The nurse told me to talk to Mom.  I talked to Mom.  I told her that everything will be fine.  As I was talking to Mom, I knew it would be the last I'd see of Mom.

 We left.  According to my best friend, Mom passed away fifteen minutes after we left.  I remember arriving at my best friend's place and the phone was ringing.  My best friend answered the phone and immediately started crying.  I just knew.  Mom passed away because of cancer. 

The same thing that took my Uncle away earlier when my Grandmother was still alive. 

At the same time, I was in shock.  Mom was my best friend.  Even though we have had really hard times when I was growing up, we were still best friends. 

Sometimes after I joined Second Life, I found out about Relay for Life.  I wanted to join and offer support.  I did join Relay for Life. 

I did move on, knowing that Mom is with my Uncle and Grandmother.  I know that one day, I would join them.  Yes, I do miss them, and yes, I do resent cancer in every possible way, knowing that cancer did strike four times in my family – my Grandfather, my Grandmother, my Uncle, and my Mother got cancer.  My grandmother survived cancer (it was skin cancer).  I don't know about my Grandfather.  All I know is that my Grandfather did not die of cancer.  It would be my Uncle and mother who died of cancer.  I miss them very much. 

One day, I asked Bixyl Shuftan if I can write about my family having cancer and how it affected me, seeing that my family had been hit by cancer.  I can honestly tell you that each time, it's the same thing.  A hard cold blow, knowing what would happen in the end with my mother.  Do I hate cancer for taking my family away from me?  Yes, I do, very much hate cancer. 

I just know that later on, my best friend got cancer.  She would later die of a cardiac arrest.  I miss her, too. 

Do I think that I might one day get cancer because my family got it?  Yes, it scares me.  But is it possible?  No.  My father's family doesn't get cancer.  When it comes to my uncle and mother, both their parents got cancer. 

Now, I'm a little sad, missing my family.  That's the reason why I joined Relay for Life.  It's so I can offer support to people who have been affected by cancer in any way.

Deaflegacy

"Your Mother Had Cancer."

By Deaflegacy

"Your mother had cancer."

I just looked at the interpreter before looking away.  Later on, I met with my Mother and my best friend.  My mother had been spending some time in the ER.  It had something to do with her stomach so my best friend spent some time with her.  That day, we found out that the doctor can't do anything for my Mother.  It was too late.  It was then recommended that my mother go to the hospice.  We agreed on that. 

Later on, I saw my mother in the hospice.  It was like a home, but these who were about to say good bye to like.  I remember the day before and my mother was doing just fine.  We talked.  We have had fun.  I will never ever forget that day I said good bye to my mother.  My best friend and I went to see her. 

She was in bed.  One of her eyes was closed, and another was open.  I knew right then that I have to say good bye to her.  The nurse stopped by and encouraged me to talk to my mother.  I did exactly that.  I told my Mother that everything will be okay.  My best friend and I will be all right.  We will do what we can for the family dog.  The family dog's name is Gracey.  I said good-bye and we left. 

When we got home, my best friend received a phone call from the hospice.  Fifteen minutes after we left, my Mother passed away.  While my best friend wept, I was in shock.  I knew that my Mother was going to join my Grandmother in Heaven.  I just wasn't expecting that soon.  It still is very painful for me to think about it, especially when we have to give the family dog up for adoption.  I have no idea where Gracey is right now, but I hope she is doing well. 

So many things have gone by and I still think about my Mother.  To me, she was everything.  It is true that there had been bad times, but there had been good times as well.  She was not just my mother.  She was my best friend.  Cancer took her away from me and I did say good bye to her that day, August 15, almost three years ago.  I'd say that this coming August 15 would be the three year anniversary since my Mother passed away.  Not a day had gone by that I don't think about her.  All I can say is that she is in Heaven with my grandmother and uncle.  I didn't tell her this but I might as well say it out loud.  My Mother was much more than just my mom and best friend.  She was my mentor. 

Deaflegacy

Leona Kitty: "My Experience With Cancer"

By Leona Kitty

Hello folks! It has been a very long time since I have been able to write an article for the SL Newser. And I am grateful to Bixyl for allowing me to stick around and not kick me to the curb! Real life takes priority at times and that takes me away a lot. But this time things were different and I wanted to open up about it for the first time.

I have always been a pretty private person and I keep things to myself but what I am currently going through is something I do want to share. Not for my benefit but in hopes to help others. So allow me to explain. Just over two months ago I was diagnosed with Cancer. Breast cancer to be exact and since I have spent my entire life being an over achiever, apparently so was my cancer. I ended up with not only a very rare and super aggressive kind, but I also tested positive not only for the BRAC1 gene but the CHEK2 as well. Told ya, over achiever!

Now, between that time and now I have had two surgeries (both not going as originally planned due to this cancer spreading) but I am now Stage 4 and incurable. The cancer managed to spread to not only 27 lymph nodes but both ovaries as well. I have been to a cancer treatment center and heading to another this week for as many options as I can get. And while I will never be cured, I am searching for the right place to go to have the longest and best life they can possibly give me.

So with all of that being said, let me get to the point of this article. I mentioned before I wanted to help others. It is absolutely impossible to understand what it feels like to have cancer unless you have it. You will go through such a wide variety of emotions and you never know which one to expect next. And I can tell you without a doubt that those emotions do intensify going from Stage 1 to Stage 4. Cancer is a terrifying disease, and most times you will not even know how to feel or what you want or need. So that is where friends and family come in.... or should!

"Those of you who love us -- please  never  be so afraid of our tears that you won't let us cry with you. For if you never see us cry, believe me it doesn't mean we aren't crying. It only means we're doing it alone." - Vickie Gerard

This statement could not be more true. I was never a very social person. I was basically a workaholic and when I was not working I was at home relaxing but I do have a lot of really great friends. Sadly, when cancer strikes, those friends are not sure how to act or what to say. So instead of coming to visit or wanting to hang out with you, they avoid you. They become too busy. If I had a dollar for every time a friend told me they were feeling sick and did not want to take the chance to get me sick in my condition. Please though, do not let cancer stop you from being there for your friend.

One of my best days since being diagnosed was an afternoon that a friend came to visit me. We watched tv for an hour or so, ate dinner and then she helped me to wash my hair because I was still unable to due to surgery. And even though all of those things were so simple, it meant the world to me! Every single moment that you are talking with us, laughing with us or even gossiping about something is another moment we are happy and not thinking about our disease.

We truly cherish every moment you give to us! Whether you realize this or not, a cancer patient is not battling this disease for themselves alone. It is a very tough road. A lot of pain and emotions. We are battling this disease for you as well!

"To love a cancer patient is, in turn, to feel sad, frightened, concerned, angry, lost and often helpless -- and to do all this, for the most part, silently. Does it help you, our Loved Ones, to know that we understand this? Believe me, we do recognize and deeply appreciate the incredibly high price you pay for loving us. Every victory is yours as much as ours." - Vicki Gerard

If you have a friend who has cancer, reach out to them today! Send them a card just to let them know you are thinking about them. Better yet, stop by for a visit. It does not have to be a long one, just long enough to chat for a few minutes. Make it a point to make them smile at least once, laugh at least once. You can walk away knowing that just gave them another reason to push just a little bit harder in their battle.

~Leona Kitty

Bain Finch's Fundraiser for Aryon Dagger

By Bixyl Shuftan

Om Sunday January 6, Relay for Life member Bain Finch held an event for friend and fellow Relayer Aryon Dagger. Aryon's computer had broken and she couldn't afford a new one, just as she was facing surgery for cancer followed by weeks of recovery. So Bain talked to a few other friends, and they set up a DJ music event high over the Lemonia sim. Bain wanted to keep things somewhat quiet at first, wanting the event to be a surprise. But on the day of the benefit, it was out and clear in the open.

The event began at 10AM SL time with Vic Mornington DJing. I dropped in shortly after 11 with Bcreative Wild playing the music. Later on, Madonna Daehlie and Nuala Maracas would DJ at 12 and 1PM respectively. The place was on the inside of a sphere with the appearance of partying in the middle of space. Among the others there were Avariel Falcon in his dark unicorn avatar, Panza Eilde, Saffia Widdershins, and more. One was in a green alien avatar. Arnold (Gager) of Steelhead wraped himself up in a Christmas box, getting some chuckles, "Arnold, I don't know why, but I want to open you (laughter)." "You know cats and boxes."

During the event, the people sent words of encouragement to Aryon, which Bain relayed to her, "Hey Aryon. Go ahead and eat all the good stuff that I can't eat. You need your strength to get well, so we can all meet up in Florida." "We all love you, Aryon, and we're all with you!" "Aryon, we are all with you in this fight, till we all emerge victorious over the evil C, biggest Huggs."

The words truly touched Aryon's heart, "I cannot begin to tell you all what this means to me. I asked (Bcreative) to play this song for you all because you DO open my eyes when I cannot see through the tears, you DO give me breath after you have taken it away with the strength and love you share not only with me but all those on the dark journey. Bain and Panza, you have listened to my rants and raves, my laughter and tears and I cannot thank you enough. To everyone who has offered support and hugs and donated ... I WILL not give up ... I fight for you ALL. Thank you and I love you all SO much." these words were followed by the song, "Thank you for loving me."

Yours truly had to leave early, but I did get a message from Bain Finch later, "DONE!! (We) raised enough for Aryon and I'm at loss for words on how to thank every one." A few days later, Bain announced that the surgery had been a success and the cancer appeared not to have spread. Aryon was on her road to recovery, which would take several weeks. And thanks to Bain, she would stay in touch with her friends.

Bixyl Shuftan

"Operation Bronze," and Other Relay for Life Events

A few days ago, the Relay for Life in Second Life hit a milestone. The total amount collected since it's beginnings in 2004 had reached the one and a half million dollar amount, "At the end of April 2011, we celebrated hitting $1milion," stated Bain Finch in a post, "and in just over 400 days since that amazing feat, you went and raised that bar to $1.5m."


The weekend of June 8-10 saw a number of Relay events. Among them was the RFL Street Fair held at Lollygagger Lane at Menophara on June 9 from 9AM to 7PM. Conducted by the Lollygagger and Hobo groups, the event promised an art gallery, bus tours, a mud wrestling ring, tarot card readings, a kissing booth, and of course the live music events, such as Frets Nirvana. And there was "more free stuff than you can shake your rat-on-a-stick at." The area had a general run-down look with automobile shells and other debris alongside shacks. There were a number of goods set up to sell to raise money.

Dropping by in the middle of the event, there were a number from Europe still up, Firery Broome asking, "I can not believe that you EU peoples are still awake." "Hehehe!" "Just getting started Fire." "We Germans still party."

For those who don't know, "lollygagger" was what one Linden was quoted as calling those residents whom were always complaining about the Lab, and the name was soon adopted by some with rebellious streaks.

The big event that weekend was "Operation Bronze" on Saturday June 9. For twelve hours from Noon to Midnight SL time, Relayers would party at ACS Island. The purpose of the event was to boost the totals of active but underperforming teams to 10,000 Lindens, which ranks as Bronze status in the Relay. The idea had started at the "Halfway There Fair" earlier this season.

For this Bronzing event, 25 smaller teams had their totals raised to Bronze rank. From Zelda Generations to WrongSide Relay, to Asylum, these obscure teams had their moment in the sun, and a new status while DJs like Fuzzball Ortega and Trader1 Whiplash did the music for the dancing Relayers. All teams that had raised at least one Linden were elgible. And by the events end, the last elgible team was at  10,000 total, "2890 now! … 1890 to go! … 790 to go!" "Yes! We did it!" "Last team bronzed." "Oh my God! What an achievement!" "SL Relayers are Amazing!" "You guys rock!"

The event was marked by wisecracks and joking around. One guy spent his time in a feral deer avatar, leading to some jokes about being a hatrack. But there was also more sentimental statements, "I was part of something great, and found I have a family here who I can reply on and will help if I can."

As Bain Finch put it, "It really was beautiful to witness the birth of Bronzing.

To see the team totals, Click Here.

Sunday was another event by Team Harmony of Hope, "Racing Tiny Cars for a Cure" at the Yes sim. The event took place on a track under a roller coaster. The little cars were cute, getting in them showing an animation of the character squeezing in, and then the rear license place showing the driver's first name. "I still have no clue how i got into the thing!" Trader1 Whiplash Exclaimed. People were asked to donate at least 50 Lindens.

Unfortunately, the cars could be difficult to drive, instead of bouncing around obstacles mine would launch in the air and come back down. Eventually, mine was knocked off course and into the lake. Still, everyone had fun.

There were of course other events that weekend. Among them was a race by the Strigoi Motorcycle Club. They found themselves without a sim and appealed for help. Ghostriders World MC heard about their problem, and offered their own sim for the event.

It was a good weekend for the Relay for Life

Bixyl Shuftan

Sabine McGettigan and her Passionate Redheads

I have been in Second life a long time, over four and half years, and every day I learn or see something new within the digital universe that we all inhabit.

A few days ago I spoke with Sabine McGettigan and her SL Partner Daaneth. They told me why they have red hair and what they are passionate about. Sabine herself has had breast cancer from 14 years ago, and Daaneth lost his sister to pancreatic cancer years ago. I shared with them both that I myself lost my mother to ovarian cancer many years ago. So this is certainly something I can get passionate about as well.

I had commented that cancer is never fair as it threatens your life or someone that you care about. With that in mind Sabine and Daaneth aren’t super heroes like you about in comics, but heroes who dedicate themselves to doing all they can to fight cancer.

Sabine and Daaneth head the Passionate Redheads, a Relay for Life group existing within the SL universe. Just like the real life version, the Relay for Life sponsors runners or walkers to raise funds for the American cancer society (Or ACS). Just like in real life the walkers have to walk a great distance, as they said 34 sims long. Daaneth admitted to staying up for 30 hours during the SL version Relay for Life and crashing afterwards. Volunteers like Shockwave and Lomgren built the Relay camp for the Passionate Redheads. The whole Relay is 24 hours, but the walkers take turns so not everyone walks the whole 24 hours.

Sabine and Daaneth told me they have to prepare six months ahead of time starting around St. Patrick’s Day. Right now that’s not very far away. The whole event stops in the middle of July. All their extra effort pays off though. Altogether the lindens that the Passionate Redheads have raised in the last 5 years equals $30,800 in US dollars. Divide that by 5 and that’s $6,160 per year. On top of that Sabine and her team have won various awards for their hard work and passion. Sabine and her Passionate Redheads won Spirit of Relay Award and Golden Team Award two years in a row.

Sabine’s Passionate Redheads may only equal 100 people or so compared to other teams (yes the Passionate Redheads is not the only team in SL), however ...

Sabine McGettigan: “We're always in the top ten."

One of the unique ways where the Passionate Redheads raised funds that two people who are furry like me changed to human avatars. As a furry I can say that is a huge sacrifice as I feel awkward if I’m not a fox or griffin. Rita herself raised 80,000 Linden in the "Bid me Human" event from the bunny avatar she has. Bixyl himself was a cowboy human to also raise Linden for their cause.

Sabine McGettigan: Daaneth had a stroke 3 weeks into the Relay Season.
Sabine McGettigan: He came back and could not type, so he used voice to help lead the team.

I myself remember hearing Daaneth over voice chat at a Sunweavers event encouraging people to raise money for the ACS. His real life voice did sound broken, but still vigorous as he wanted his team to continue fighting. The Sunweavers is a furry group which holds various events on Rita’s sim. Many of the Sunweavers have joined up with the Passionate Redheads. For Daaneth’s amazing attitude and refusal to give up after his stroke he was given an award.

Sabine McGettigan: Then last year Daaneth won the most special of all: The Spirit of Relay Individual Award.

Cancer is something that devastates or has devastated people in their life and their families and friends. For myself I lost my mother and Sabine it threatened her life. For Daaneth it took his sister’s life.

It’s not the kind of monster you can just swing an axe at or shoot at like in a video game. It’s something that the Passionate Redheads want to slay with passion and refusing to give up. If you happen to see a passionate redhead or any other Relay team help them out. It doesn’t matter which team you support it’s all for the same cause:

To cure cancer.

Grease Coakes

The 2011 Relay for Life Walk

I’ve gone to every Relay walk since 2007, when an old friend told me about the first one. Last year in 2010 was the first I did do as part of a team, the Passionate Redheads. The event then was truly a blast. Some yearly events I’ve gone to, the old feeling of excitement of the first time isn’t there. But that certainly wasn’t a problem here.

Just before noon SL time on Saturday July 16th, I arrived at the castle set up on the four corners of the sims the four sims RFL Wish, Unity, Voulenteer, and Treatment. The place needed the capacity of four sims as it was truly packed. When I brought up the map, I counted a total of 127 avatars in four sims. I watched the event along with fellow Redheads Nydia Tungsten, Treminari Huet, Lomgren Smalls, and Skylark LeFavre, along with a variety of other avs from tines to merfolk to superheros to robots.

There were a number of speeches given at the opening, but one stood out. Bootedgirl Foxtrot gave a speech that could be done only through a computerized voice. Cancer had taken away her larynx.


I relay for, each day we all can awake, with the gift of time we are given, to see the world, and love and be loved, and continue to pass on the very hope that will live on forever. I relay for the dream, for more time, for all those touched with cancer, to have quality time, in life, without pain. I relay for each day I awake, for each moment I see my Second life partner, my Love Jay, who saw me through many late hours of pain, and now enjoy many late hours of laughter. I relay for others to have what I now have, a chance to live and give back hope, and help however I can.

Shortly after her speech and the cheers that followed, the hour was up, and it was time for the Survivor/Caregiver lap. Those whom had faced the disease and survived, and those who cared for them, were invited to take the first of the official laps. Some Sunweavers such as Elphias Kojishi walked the track. Others just went to our camp and cheered them on. Among them was Rita Mariner, back as a purple bunnygirl after being “pardoned” from her remaining time stuck as a human. Two of the Redheads, also bunnygirls, did their cheering in cheerleader outfits, which was an interesting sight for the guys walking the track. As the survivors and caregivers walked, someone pointed out that the music being played was written just for the Relay.

there is no finish line until we find a cure,
together we begging like soldiers in a war,
and we won't slow down 'till we win this fight,
the Relay for Life.

Our camp “Peace to All Who Enter Here,” was a peaceful forest area, with a gateway of roses. Virtual critters such as squirrels and deer walked about the place. The center was dominated by a huge tree. the back of the camp had a picturesque waterfall. There was also a ride, a balloon, that took riders over the camp for a few minutes. A prayer book recorded messages, which then floated into the virtual breeze.

A number of Second Life notables took part in the Relay. Some such as Bryn Oh had contributed builds. Others did the Walk. Among them was Jaycatt Nico of the noted “Jaycatt & Frogg” musical pair. He greeted me and the rest of the Sunweavers, hung around a few minutes, and made a good-sized donation before leaving. Blogger DrFran Babcock walked by and gave a hello. I also saw two longtime friends Breezes Babi and Glitter Xeltentat walk by. One of the Relay staff, Samara Barzane, came by as a pink catgirl.

The total number of people I recognized, well, not enough room to mention them all.

And then, it was the team’s turn to walk. With Danneth Kivioq, Rita, and Dusk leading the way, we got on the track and began walking, waving our huge Sunweaver flags. Helping us was an accessory called a “walker” that was worn on our backs that allowed us to walk automatically while typing, or taking pictures. We just needed someone to follow. And so, we began our journey down the track, those without walkers picking them up at one of the stops along the way.

The Relay’s theme this year was “Season of Hope,” and many of the sims reflected the seasons. The northwest had spring, the southeast had summer, including the water sims with a beach area, the southwest had autumn, including a school for the youngsters, and to the northwest winter, most of the sims there snowed over. The Redhead’s camp was in RFL Family, in the northeast corner near the middle. And going throughout the track, we found a variety of builds. Some were very well done and imaginative.

Unfortunately with all the people on the track, lag was a persistent problem. A time or two it was so bad that the teammates around me were all rendered invisible. And there were times some of us were left behind due to it, and someone would have to port us forward to rejoin the group. We had to stop a few times due to a sim that was closed from further people entering, appearing like it vanished. And a few times I would just up and crash. And I didn’t reappear where I crashed, but where I had logged off the previous night, at the rest stop sponsored in Artistic Fimicloud’s name. By some coincidence, the first time this happened, my teammates caught up to me, which got a few comments from them.

The result was we made our lap, but we’d had to skip sims due to the lag and crashes, and some of us got back later than others. Some of us stayed at the camp, others kept going, “I want to complete the lap for real.”

For the themed laps, many of us dressed for the occasion. On the “I Can’t Believe I’m Wearing This!” I went back to the human avatar I wore after my “Bid Me Human” Event. Others had some avatars that certainly drew attention. On the “Ride Your Favorite Horse,” I tried to bring out my mount, but for some reason it wouldn’t rezz.

At times, we didn’t walk, but took a moment to look at some of the builds. This included the Steampunk New Babbage, or the Activity Water Region. There was also a scavenger hunt taking place, mostly in the four corner sims, where one had to find the objects on the list.

Over the group chat, I heard of “Bid me Bald” events being done. But one lady had a different idea, a “Pumped Up for Relay - Evangeline Ling, Co-Captain in team Relay for HOPE will be getting PUMPED UP and will be a body builder for every 1000 L donated to her challenge kiosk.” Enough was raised to give her an athletic look for several weeks.

At 7PM, most of us took a break from the walking to head to the club at the Unity sim, not far from the castle. It was Dusk Griswold’sturn to DJ, and as always she did it well from a stocked playlist. She played a number, some were requests. But at one point, she had one in honor of Artistic Fimicloud, the late Sunweaver & Redhead whom is always remembered. For her, Dusk played “Calypso.”


To sail on a dream on a crystal clear ocean,
to ride on the crest of a wild raging storm.
To work in the service of life and living,
in search of the answers of questions unknown.
To be part of the movement and part of the growing,
part of beginning to understand,
Aye Calypso the places you've been to,
the things that you've shown us,
the stories you tell.
Aye Calypso, I sing to your spirit,
the men who have served you so long and so well.


At 9PM was the Luminary Ceremony, and the Redheads went back to camp. The track darkened all over to night, and everyone went silent, in memory of those passed on. But at 10, the sunshine came back, and we were out on the track again. 12 AM was the Masquerade, and out came my vampire bat avatar, flying over the track.’

Yours truly had to take a break to get some sleep, but woke up a little early to rejoin the Relay. This time, a couple Redheads whom couldn’t be there Saturday made it on Sunday, notably Alleara Snoodle. In previous Relays, Alleara had either helped with the building or designed items such as clothes. But this year, events in real life simply couldn’t be put aside. Fortunately, she was able to join her teammates this day.

The Passionate Redheads officially reached “Platinum” status at the Relay Walk. Daaneth made the announcement sometime on Sunday, “Congratulations on all your hard work. You have made me proud to be a Redhead.” And for every Relayer in all of the teams, a small “Teamwork Awars” trophy was delivered.

Finally at 10 AM were the closing ceremonies. Getting back to the castle, the walls and avatars alike took a good deal of time to rezz. Congratulations to all had been going around since the morning, and continued at the closing.

YOU ALL ROCK! - Every last one of you has contributed to making this an amazing Relay. From the tiniest *waves at Lom* to the biggest *waves at King-Kong!* It has been a wonderful experience! And the commitment of our sponsors to RFL of SL has been heartwarming and generous. Thank you ALL so much. Here's a blogpost by Poppy listing y'all. http://rflofsl.blogspot.com/2011/07/thank-you-to-our-sponsors.html


It was announced we had broken our seasonal fundraising record, again. Nearly 75 million Lindens had been raised, equaling over $373,000 US dollars. There were also some stories of inspiration at the closing, though before the ceremonies, Redhead Nydia Tungsten shared the following:


Why I Relay I had never heard of RFL before in my life, even though I watched my step father slowing die from cancer, it was here in Second Life that I learned of it as I listened to some one speak of it, she was describing someone to me that she had lost as well, and I heard others speak of her, that is how I got to know Fimi, and Dusk Invited me to the RFL Team "Passionate Redheads" since then I lost someone else dear to me Kamryn Noel, so I run for all of them, and for you all. I even run for me. When I was a kid my cure for a sunburn was to get another one on top of it. So now I have moles all over my back that I need 4 to 6 biopsied each year. I am terrified that one day I will get the news that I have it. But I will always relay for all of you no matter what.


My own reasons to Relay? Cancer doesn’t run in my family, but it has taken down those around me in real life. Neighbors, coworkers, and family pets. Here in Second Life, I’ve met a number of friends, including the Sunweavers whom make up much of the Passionate Redheads. I arrived too late to have known Fimi, but I can’t help but admire her from how she continues to be talked about.

Funding and research do work. More treatments are discovered. More methods found. And survival rates for some cancers have gone up. The true cure for all cancer still eludes modern science. But throughout the history of medical science, one disease after another that was once a death sentence have found cures and treatments that work at any stage of discovery. Maybe this will be the year a team of scientists makes the public announcement we’ve all been waiting for.

So until then, the Relay for Life will continue on, both in real life and in virtual reality.

Following the closing ceremonies, there were a display of fireworks outside the castle. And there was one last official lap, the Victory lap, the one taken in celebration. At Noon Second Life time, the 2011 Relay for Life Walk was officially over. But the Relayers remained on the grid, continuing to walk laps, explore the builds, enjoy the attractions, or just meet up for a good party. Hours later, I ran into Team Steelhead and Fuzzball Ortega still whooping it up.

The fun continued for the next few days. A few builds went down on Monday and Tuesday, but most stayed up until Wednesday night. Of the unofficial parties, two stuck out. On Tuesday was the second annual “flood party," the first one last year coming about on a whim. And Wednesday had a small “Tear-down party.” On Thursday at Noon, what builds remained were removed. It was then that the Relay for Life Walk was truly over for another year.

The fundraising season isn’t officially over yet, though. August 20 is the official closing event. And once that’s over with, comes the planning for next year, and the planning for the next Relay track, with teams trying to make their next builds better than ones before.

And of course, continuing to meet up with the new friends we made, and old friends we caught up with.

Go Relay!

Bixyl Shuftan

Last Call for Fun at the 2010 RFL Track

Just before the sims for the 2009 Relay for Life Walk were taken down, the teams held a “teardown party.” I never found out if it was planned, or came about spontaneously, but it was quite a sight, with everyone whooping it up, builders, team captains and officers, and bystanders such as a certain reporter.

I expected something similar this year. But it didn’t quite happen like last year. After the Walk was over, many of the officers in the Passionate Redheads group either dropped out of sight or were on little. As it turned out, the Redheads had to deal with a number of problems this year, many of the people getting sick, having to help family, or otherwise had to deal with real-life problems. Combined with the “Great Recession” as the current economy is sometimes labeled as having, the Redheads endured what one called “a perfect storm” of trouble that could easily stall a fundraiser in its tracks. And still, the team managed to raise thousands in US dollars.

Maybe the other big teams were having similar trouble. I didn’t hear of one big last party, though did notice a number of small gatherings on the map on Tuesday July 20th, the last day before the builds were to be torn down. Deciding to drop in on one, I found a gathering of people at a beach scene, with plastic pails and kiddie shovels, sand mounds one could bury themselves in to their necks, with a huge sand castle in the middle. It turned out that the DJ here was also broadcasting into the radio stream over the RFL track area. Redhead builder Shockwave Yarearch also dropped by, joining in the dancing for a while.

As the party went on, the DJ gave an announcement. One of the track sim managers had raised the water level by ten meters, flooding the place. A little later, he described people going over to party over there, and more and more of the people at the beach party headed over. I was among them, teleporting over to the sim, and indeed it was all wet, trees with water up to their leaves and buildings with water halfway up the walls. Unlike a real-life flood, no damage done here, though.

Someone began passing around ducky inner tubes. They really couldn’t keep you afloat without a swimmer AO, but fortunately I remembered I had one. More began appearing, a few others probably using some kind of AO to help them float. Others deployed umbrellas and floated around like Mary Poppins. Then a boat showed up, captained by someone looking like a pirate, and someone else in a tiny duck avatar on board. It was certainly weather for ducks at one point when rain began coming down. Rain is pretty rare in Second Life, and for some it was the first they had seen it.

People were having a great time, laughing and joking, and then came the fish puns, “Oh my cod!” “I did it for the halibut.” “I’m calling the carps.” People even talked about doing a water sim next Relay, selling mermaid/merman avatars and swimmer AOs for charity.

More recently, I did hear of a party the Redheads will be having to celebrate their success at the Relay, on Saturday August 14th at 10 AM. Enough time for those most involved to take a well-deserved rest.

But it’s that spur of the moment party at the flooded sim that to me represents the final bash of the 2010 Relay for Life track.

Bixyl Shuftan

More Scenes From The RFL Walk

Some more scenes from the Relay for Life Walk on July 17 & 18th.

The Passionate Redheads, at least those visible through the lag, going past the Roma camp. In ancient times, surgery to remove tumors was sometimes done, though without the benefit of painkillers.

A lady from Roma, dressed to kill, making her walk.

A dwarf and a human from a Fantasy RFL group.

One of the few feral avatars on the track, this little critter hopes to "ferret" some donations.

Sim down due to lag. Too many Redheads on the track?

One of the karjia (servants) from the "Goreans for Life."

Meeting with the lioness Kamiliah Hauptman, Vicerine of Caledon, at the Caledonian camp.

A child avie makes her way down the track.

Another feral running down the track, flag in hand, or rather jaw.

With the lag, sometimes it seemed like you were the only one on the track.

One advantage of the Relay on Second Life, the only TP you had to worry was there stood for "teleport."
A lady dressing up for the "Caring & Curing" hour on Sunday morning. "Helllllooooooooo nurse!"
A cancer survivor at the Redhead base, Sunday morning.

This picture was contributed by one of the Redheads, showing the display of fireworks at the close of the Relay for Life Walk.

Bixyl Shuftan

RFL: Scenes from The Walk

There were far more pictures taken of the Relay for Life Walk than could be fitted in the article on July 20. So here are a few.


A picture contributed by one of the Redheads, showing us cheering the walkers on.


Skylark had the only 'taur avatar that I noticed. Despite the lag, the back legs seemed to move okay.



A picture from Daaneth, showing him and Sabine on the Walk.


A screenshot of the map by Sabine, showing hundreds of avatars on the track.


A friend from the old newspaper, Glitter Xeltentat.

Bixyl Shuftan