The Valentine Interview - Part 2

By Mylie Foxclaw

This is the second part of the Valentine’s interview.  The basics are simple.  I have asked 6 women the same questions that I asked the men in part one.  If you wish to read the first part, you will find it here (link).

The first question was about the type of person that would be ideal.  One common quality was intelligence and a good sense of humour but each woman was highly descriptive about her ideal person.  A.A (Lady 1) wants someone confident that can convey intense and realistic emotions and who has a good sense of humour.  C.R (Lady 2) feels that someone trustworthy would be great.  She also adds that she dislike possessive and jealous persons.  J.B (Lady 3), like A.A, wants someone intelligent and funny.  An opinion also shared by R.M (Lady 4) who adds that the ideal person should also show how much he enjoys being with her and he must be a true romantic.  F.R (Lady 5) mentions that a good sense of humour is an important quality and specifies “not someone who just laughs pointlessly at everything.”  T.K (lady 6) believes that a good person is one important quality and adds that “Someone who's also a vulpine or near canine would be perfect.”

Next, I asked each lady about their ideal place for a SL romantic date.  A.A feels that a restaurant or piano bar would be nice.  C.R likes forests, beaches or coffee shops.  J.B talks about a dance at an exclusive club where she is a member and has many friends.  R.M enjoys ballroom spots like Phat Cat’s or Bogarts.  F.R says that she would not like generic places but rather opt for something that has meaning for both herself and her ideal sl valentine.  T.K specifies that she loves cozy cuddle places which are calm, secluded and close to nature.

The third question was about their ideal gift.  A.A immediately responded “his heart”.  C.R specifies that a teddybear and a kiss would be nice but if the person could spend time with her and snuggle, it would be perfect.  J.B would like a volcano tub.  R.M mentions jewellery, perfume or lingerie before adding that going to a romantic sport together to spend some quality time would be a nice gift. 

When asked if they thought that red was a must for Valentine’s day, A.A says no before adding that “I don´t think it is about the color, it is a feeling deep inside; and i truly believe that valentine is only special with somebody who means something to you ... a flirt is not enough.”  C.R points out that red is generic, something that F.R seems to agree on.  R.M thinks that it is not a must.  To her, Red is“anytime   you’re feeling   a bit passionate and fiery.”  T.K comments that one should wear what they want before adding that red is classic and she finds that red and blue work great together.  As for J.B, she thinks that Red is a must and that any shade or red is pretty.

The next question was about what they would wear for Valentine’s day.  J.B has immediately described the outfit she has bought this Valentine’s day.  She is extremely eager and excited to wear it.  It’s a color combination of red and black.  A.A thinks that the outfit would depend on where her date would be taking her, an opinion shared by F.R.  C.R simply said that her outfit would depend on her mood.  R.M mentioned lingerie and anything red.    T.K believes that the outfit also depends on where the relationship stands and specifies that “If we're just getting to know each other, it might be something sexy ment to impress.  If we've been dating for a while, perhaps something more comfortable.  As for colors, black and red look good with blue fur.”

Finally, I asked them if they had anything to say about Valentine’s day.  A.A thinks that “for somebody who is in love - any day is valentine’s day ....”  C.R says that “Well it’s Valentine’s day.  It’s great to enjoy it with someone special.  But it’s a nightmare for single people I think!“  J.B talks about her current relationship, “well this  will be my first one with my living in boyfriend so I’m very much looking forward to it and we’ve been together for 6 weeks aprox.”  R.M sends her wishes to everyone, “Happy VDay to all  the lovers a  lovers  to be!”  F.R mentions that “my original rez day was just a couple days before it?”  T.K also wised everyone and had a smart piece of advice, “I wish you all friendship and love.  Remember that love comes and goes, but if you're best friends with your mate, then it'll last.  That's the secret!”

This sums up the Valentine’s interview.  I hope you found some interesting SL facts and more through this.

Mylie Foxclaw

The Valentine Interview - Part 1

By Mylie Foxclaw

As Valentine’s Day is approaching, I thought of interviewing a few persons to learn more about how they felt about Valentine’s Day and romance in Second Life.  If this first part, I interviewed 6 male residents at random and asked them 5 questions.  Responses were interesting and amusing in some instances.  Let’s see what these SL residents had to say.  I’m using only their initials when I will refer to their personal opinions.

First, I asked each guy to tell me about the type of person who would be an ideal date.  Overall, they all believe that a good-natured person would be perfect.  Someone smart and good-natured.  Of course, each guy also has his own qualities as well.  A.L (Guy 1) believes that that person should not be jealous.  He also adds that he likes women who are open-minded and do not limit themselves to one guy.  R.C (guy 2) thinks that someone who is naughty and argumentative would be perfect.  G.H (guy 3) also likes those who are open-minded.  S.B (guy 4) wants someone who has common interests.  J.L (guy 5) and S.R (guy 6) told me that they like those who can carry a good conversation.

Next, I asked each guy about their ideal place to go if they have a date.  A.L and J.L both opt for romantic outdoor themed places (forests, beaches,etc).  S.R and G.H think that ballrooms would be perfect.  S.B told me that he’s like a colourful sim with low lag and R.C told me that his ideal place would be a creepy themed sim like Netherwood. 

Concerning the ideal gift, responses were interesting.  A.L told me that the perfect gift would be for his woman to share him with another woman.  R.C said that for him, “something either black, rusty metal, bloody, creepy, or any combination of the 4” would be great.  G.H thinks that a new outfit would be cool.  J.L does not want any special gifts but a greeting card for valentine’s day would be nice.  S.B wants to hear a joke that would make him laugh for hours.  S.R did not have any ideal gift. 

When I asked each guy if Red was a must for Valentine’s day, most of them said no.  R.C added that red is boring to him for Valentine’s day.  S.R feels that it is a tradition to wear red but it’s not compulsory.    However, G.H thinks it’s a must. 

When I asked them about what they would wear for Valentine’s day, S.R told me that he would opt for a Tuxedo. G.H would also wear a Tuxedo specially for a ballroom date and opt for a red tie. S.B also mentioned a red tie before jokingly adding that he would dress like Tarzan.  I suppose a Tarzan outfit and a red tie would be an interesting combination.  R.C stated that a black dress shirt or a black tuxedo would be his choice of outfit.  As for A.L he says his birthday suit is perfect… J.L does not have any special outfit preference for Valentine’s day.  He would just be himself. 

Finally I asked them if they had anything to add.  J.L says that “one should take time to acknowledge the day and show some kind of gesture.”  S.R thinks that “its a special day just to show someone you care.”  G.H mentioned that he loved someone a lot.  R.C humorously stated that “Hmmm. That we also need an M Day, that is just about giving muffins.” And I definitely agree with him!  As for S.B,  he simply said, “Make love not war ...”  And, A.L had a lot to say, “really though, surveys consistently show that Valentine's day is more stressful to men, more dreaded than a dentist visit because there's a lot of pressure.  what do I get her? where do I take her? what do I say?  we just want it to be over.”

So, I believe we learned a few interesting things from these guys.  See you next time to find out how girls think Valentine’s day.  

Mylie Foxclaw

DJ Clair Knows How to Make Hearts Sing

By Celene Highwater

  DJ Clair Westbrook knows how to spin romantic tunes to make the heart flutter. Her perfect blend of romance, and upbeat tunes feels seamless, and every song she plays seems to complement the one before it.

  I met DJ Clair Westbrook when I teleported into Oceana, a beautiful ballroom set in a picturesque location by the sea. I was instantly in love with her mix of music and eventually asked if I could interview her for an article. She readily agreed to the interview and soon, after working around her hectic schedule and mine, we sat down for a chat.

  In college, Westbrook studied animation and found SL through her studies. When she joined, it was with an avatar under a different name and she spent the first two years of her Second Life as a builder. Then, she explained in her interview, she was hacked and decided to stop building as often. Now, she only builds when she needs to.

When she reentered Second Life it was with a new avatar that would lead her into a new field: romantic DJ.

“I love music, always have. I was a hostess for six months of Clair’s newby phase. There I noticed what was in... what kind of music was what. I always loved romantic music.”

She continues: “I was partnered to Edwardo (her love) for three years and we always would go dancing to romantic venues. So it was only logical I chose this type of music. I love it; I know it, don't get tired of it. You choose what you love to do when you do it every day multiple times. You won't get burned on it.”

When I asked her how she finds the music she plays she said: “I skim through the pop and select romantic music from it. I also check Billboard to see new music. Remakes of old (songs) are very popular too. I also visit a lot of sets to get an idea of the public's likes.”

 “This is more alternative... I play it sometimes but mostly I do the romance venues,” she says, showing me different songs and genres. “This is modern romantic.”

The type of music she plays depends on the venue, she says.

 “I also have jazzy romantic, which I do for Phat Cat's Elite. It’s evening music and is well liked.”

Due to a move in real-life, she only has time to DJ at Wheelies. But she plans to resume her schedule in April.


Celene Highwater

Ask DrFran: The Green-Eyed Monster

By DrFran Babcock

Dear DrFran:

I never thought that I would be someone who would write to you. I mean, I have never really had much in the way of problems in my life, and haven’t really had the need to ask for help. I seem to have become another person lately.

It’s funny, in a way, because many people believe that Second Life™ is the place to become someone other than the human you are—to try on a new persona.  The new “me” should have been someone with better values and qualities to admire. Yet, I have become someone I would look upon with scorn.

I was not looking for romance in Second Life™. I was at a concert of a performer whom I like a lot, when I received an IM from someone I didn’t know. They asked me about something I had in my profile that had to do with an interest in railroads in Second Life™. Instead of jumping to the conclusion that it was a pick up line, I responded, and we chatted happily while listening to the music. It turned out that Carl liked this singer as much as I did, and that we had a few other interests in common. He was involved in the mainland railroads, and we shared about sims we had visited with active trains. He mentioned a few other places to which I had never been that had great train sets on them. I didn’t think anything of it, and logged when the concert was over.

The following day, Carl IMed me, sent me a friend request, and asked me if I wanted to see some of the beautiful train sims we had chatted about. I agreed, and we spent a very pleasurable few hours visiting the NY Healthscape sims, which have a long train ride on them, and a group of Japanese sims that had a monorail.

Fast forward to three months later, and Carl and I are spending most of our time in Second Life together. I never realized how close you can become to someone when you only have  voice or typing for commnication.

Slowly, I found myself becoming very dependent upon Carl for passing the hours in world. It was such a gradual transition, that it took me by surprise when he didn’t log in one day, and I found myself in a sad and angry state. This was so not me. I am not someone who moons over guys, and Carl wasn’t even a flesh and blood presence in my life. What the heck was going on?

I couldn’t believe that I had been moved to such an extreme of emotion, so I was not prepared for what followed. Carl was not about much any more. I remembered that he had told me the name of an alt he used, he said, when he was working on the mainland train and trolley lines. I searched for the name of the alt, and was surprised to find that the alt was online.

What I did next was shameful. Even now, as I think of it, I redden and dislike myself. I logged in an alt, and IMed Carl’s alt. I made up a silly excuse about a trolley on the mainland line malfunctioning and his name was on the vehicle. He asked for a TP, and we spent a few minutes chatting.  I scrutinized his profile and saw a pick for his home location.  I went on the Marketplace and spent a lot of Lindens on a spy HUD.

In the following days I hung out near Carl’s alt’s home sim, and waited with the spy HUD. It only took two days before I found him several thousand meters away on his sim. There was another green dot on the map with him. Knowing that he might not even remember my alt, I TPed over to his location, and spied behind the walls to find him in an embrace with another female avatar.

I teleported away, but frankly, I don’t kno whether to be more upset about his infidelity, or the way I behaved. This jealous, stalking behavior—where did it come from? In truth, I haven’t stopped. I keep stalking both avatars whenever I can. I have map rights on Carl, and check out where he is whenever I can. It takes all my willpower not to teleport right up to him and confront him. I have been so ashamed that I have stopped speaking with him, and log on at times when I know he cannot be in world.

Help me to make sense of this, DrFran. 

Sign me: Jealous Fool


Dear Jealous:

I can see how Carl’s behavior was hurtful, and could have brought about the response that you describe. I don’t really have a lot of information about Carl from your letter, and will have to speak in generalities. I congratulate you on the bravery it must have taken to write to me about this.

Human nature is odd, and we can never know when something will happen that will trigger a response in us that seems out of character. A good example of this is when people behave in extraordinarily brave ways when a crisis occurs.  Conversly, the worst in us can come out in certain situations. We all have a dark side; all of us. It is impossible to be human without it. Most of the time this side of us doesn’t surface. The response to Carl pulling away from you must have reminded you of some long ago loss of a person’s attention.

Psych 101 quickie class: Whenever I have a strong reaction to a seemingly neutral or upsetting situation, there is information I can learn. For example: I grew up in a home where mistakes and failures were just not permitted. If I came home with a 99% on a test, I was asked why I hadn’t gotten a 100% on the test. Of course, as an adult, I have come to understand that a 99% is a damned good grade. However, any time I feel that I am being criticized, or told that my work is not up to par, I really start to freak out. I am able to say to myself: “That was then, and this is now,” and I avoid a melt down. When I was younger, it was not so easy.

What I think you need to think about, Jealous is if you can make a connection with Carl’s infidelity. As I said, I don’t have enough information to even make a guess as to what it might be. However, I do think that someone in your early years did something that you may have interpreted as a betrayal.

Stalkers often behave as they do because they feel a loss of control, when someone pulls away from them. The more the person detaches from them; the stronger the urge to cling, and to demand information. This only pushes the person further away. Therefore, the only suggestion I have beyond looking into your past, is to stop the behavior immediately. If you can resist checking up on Carl, you will find over time, that the impulse to know what he’s up to will fade. I know it doesn’t feel that way just at this moment, but it’s so. Please don’t confront him. This will never turn out well.

Please let me know how you make out, if you uncover any past betrayals, or if you have an update on your relationship with Carl.

Fondly, DrFran

Obligatory disclaimer: The column Ask DrFran is the work of DrFran Babcock, and may not reflect the views of SL Newser as a whole. Please direct any correspondence to DrFran Babcock. I look forward to hearing from you.

Mystery Celebrates Fifth Anniversary with Week of Events

For week after week, month after month, Mystery has been one of the most active romantic-themed sims in Second Life. Every week, it’s Queen of Hearts riverboat club has held events on most days, sometimes two or more a day, both DJs and live singers. And the rest of the sim offers much to see from it’s mountain and waterfall, to it’s balloon ride, to it’s village shops and mystery manor, and much more.

On Sunday May 15th, following a few days of preparation, Mystery launched it’s Fifth Anniversary Celebration. A week of special events and the unveiling of new attractions. Sunday’s event began at 12 Noon SL time, with the ever-popular Debi Latte appearing on the deck of the Queen of Hearts to a large crowd both on the deck and on the dock below.

Also there were Mystery’s owner Tygeria Mirabeau, dressed in a revealing white gown, and manager Amythe Moonlight, in a classy black dress. Several other staff were also there. They helped liven things up with a few jokes and comments. So did Tygeria with a few playful flirty remarks to Debi, which occasionally interrupted her songs with a few giggles. Debi sung a number of songs, including the one adopted by the club as it’s signature: “Queen of Hearts.”


Playin with the Queen of Hearts,
you know it ain’t really smart.
The joker ain’t the only fool,
who’ll do anything for you.


In the middle of the songs, the fireworks went off, and the dark skies over the club were showered with colorful lights. Late in the hour, someone appeared on the ship whom hadn’t been seen in a while: Jazzz Hermit. He was greeted with smiles and a warm welcome.

Debi was scheduled to play until 1 PM, but played one more song. She then turned the stream over to Jazzz. Some of the crowd left, but a number stayed to hear Jazz sing songs such as "What Have I Got to Do to Make You Love Me?" He wondered if he was a little rusty, not having sung in a while, but everyone enjoyed the music. Peoples' attention were also drawn to a little bear magician, "The Great Teddini," behind the singer.

Following Jazzz, those attending were invited to see the sights of the sim. This included some new builds, notably the roller coaster a little distance east of the riverboat. And many did.

There would be more events as the week went on, DJs, live music, and some 7Seas fishing contests. But Sunday was a wonderful start to the anniversary celebrations.

Playin with the Queen of Hearts,
Dancin on the Queen of Hearts,
Five years of the Queen of Hearts,

Bixyl Shuftan

Mystery’s “Masked Lover” Reveals Himself

Since October 2009, The Mystery sim has had someone occasionally sending anonymous love notes, roses, and presents to sim manager Amythe Moonlight. Always sent through newbie avatars, the real source of what sim owner Tygeria Mirabeau called a “wonderful seduction” remained one of the mysteries of Mystery. Occasionally the Don Juan would take a break, but eventually would remind Amy she had an admirer.

On Easter Sunday, April 24 2011, the “Masked Lover” finally revealed himself, after the sim was done with it’s holiday event.

The event had begun innocently enough, innocent that is except for Amy’s “playboy bunny” outfit that had little fabric on it. Debi Latte was back from a hiatus, her first live performance at Mystery in weeks. The top of the deck was filled with Easter decorations, Easter eggs with prizes inside, an “Alice in Wonderland” globe with Alice and the White Rabbit slowly rotated, and while the Easter bunny may not have shown up, a number of people in kani bunny avs (and a lavender wolfess and frog) showed up to dance. It was about halfway into the party in which the familiar evil laughter echoed across the sim, and Bloodrose joined in, asking Amy for a couples’ dance.

Finally, Debi finished her last song, and people began leaving. When there were just a few others left, Bloodrose got Amy’s attention, brought up the “Masked Lover,” and admitted he was him. Amy was shocked, “It was you?! Oh my God!!” Bloodrose gave his characteristic evil laugh, quite proud in the mystery lasting so long. Debi chuckled, and admitted she was in on the big secret, much to Amy's surprise, “Debi? Oh my God! You knew?!” Blood smiled.

The pair danced together a little longer, then when Debi and one of the staff left, they decided to leave as well. And so came an end to Mystery’s most memorable Easter, and the end to the “Mystery of the Masked Lover.”

Bixyl Shuftan