Friday, December 20, 2013

Reader Submitted: My First Five Years

By Nydia Tungsten

By the time you read this my Rez day will have come and gone. December 12 2008 is when I was “Born” to this virtual world.

Five years .... wow that’s a LONG time.

Five years in anything is a long time I guess. But in a virtual world, like real life, you grow, in attitude as well as skills.

I did a lot of growing up, with such wonderful guides as Treninari, Ranchan, Alleara, and my SL Mother who took me under her wing and started me down the path of clubs and land management for that I say thank you Mother (Skylark). And one of my FIRST best friends Jian, she kept me grounded and tried to keep me out of trouble....didn’t always work, but she did try.

There are just too many to name that have entered my life and helped me grow, some no longer speak to me because each side has changed as we grew, just like real-life friendships change sometimes for the better sometimes for the worse, even those no longer in my life that have touched my heart, I will ALWAYS care about.

In my five years here I have seen people come and go. But unlike real life here we can start over if we make mistakes, as in alts. I know of plenty of alts in use by others, and as long as they are not used for griefing I see no harm in them and will NEVER reveal ANYONES alt. I have even lost a mate over that.

But where ever there are MMO’s there WILL be alts. Best way to deal with them is to take each one for who they are. THAT is one of my biggest lessons learned in five years.

I have had people try and teach me to build ..... (I can now make a decent doughnut) and tried to teach scripting (I can change the name in floating text), neither of which can I say I am accomplished. I run clubs, not to make money for those days are over. They are money pits now. I run them because I enjoy doing it. Same with my DJ’ing. I admin 10 sims and I own 3 of those, both in Second Life and in Inworldz, not getting rich, but I do get to meet some interesting people, I have friends from every continent on the globe.

When I expanded to InWorldz I was asked by many why I was leaving Second Life. My answer I was not. Not only do I have too much invested here in sims and such, but I have a family, many that care about each other. And I have my Angels, those on my friends list that I love and trust most of all. You see in real life it is hard to make anything of yourself without someone there with you to help you. any success I may be credited for, I have to credit them, I love each and every one of them.

My appearance over the years has changed as well. I have a few forms I use: Skunk, Bunny, and a few others. But I will ALWAYS be the little white vixen that enjoys helping out. I was made an official Kitsune by Alleara a while back and given a second tail for all my work in helping others (for those who don't know, they grow more tails as they grow in experience). It took me a while to get used to seeing a second tail on me. But now, if I don’t have it .... I feel as if I am missing something.

As for relationships, I have had a few, I have had my heart broken, as well as broke a couple of hearts. But none of them on either side was intentional, and I try very hard to remain on good terms with them and wish for them everything they wish for themselves. As for right now, I am in a very HAPPY relationship with my wife Brandi. She is the “Mouse that caught the Fox,” and we have been hopelessly in love ever since we slow danced (Thank you my heart : MMWHAA!).

I treat my virtual life as I would my real life one, trying to be the best person I can be. Am I an Angel? NO WAY! Heh, I screw up on a daily basis, but like real life I try and learn from my mistakes, make them right, and move on. Am I paranoid? I have been asked that by a few people. Hell, I have even asked myself that very same question. The answer would have to be yes, to a certain extent. Again, Second Life mirrors real life. There ARE people that are here that will lie, cheat, and steal because it’s easier that real work. So you HAVE to be a bit paranoid to make it anywhere.

So if you are new to Second Life or any other virtual world my advice is this: Remember there is more than sex here. Yes we ALL go through that “phase.” Don’t come looking for your perfect match thinking they will whisk you away to happiness. That road leads to a lot of pain. Instead, find friends have a good time explore everything there is to offer. And IF you find someone you might be interested in, become friends first, remain friends awhile, THEN... who knows they just MIGHT be the one. But if you go out looking for love and a mate because you NEED one right NOW, you are just going to scare them away.

Learn a skill that you like to do, then do it. Whatever it is as long as you like it, have fun with it.


Be who you are, this is Second Life. You can be whoever or whatever you want, either it is a dino serving time on a space ship, a demon loving in hell, or even a little white vixen running businesses across the grid, find your nitch and have fun with it whatever it is. That has got to be the most important thing I have learned in five years, be who and what you feel you are in your heart and I promise, you will be happy with yourself.

Nydia Tungsten


  1. I still remember when I first met Nydia. More than four years ago, she came to me asking about a collar that she feared had the ability to trap residents tricked into wearing it. This led to a discussion I ended up asking Editor Dana's advice about, and she felt this was a trick on the builders' part, trying to fool people into buying it. Nydia and I continued to keep in touch, and over time developed strong friendships.

    "Tungsten" is an appropriate surname for her as her character has a steel-like indominable will. Try to cross her, or someone close to her, and you better prepare for a large chunk of meat removed from your behind. But her spirit comes with a tender heart, always willing to listen, and has always offered a second chance.

    Thank you for all you do, our scruffy, naughty, helpful vixen. :-)

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